April 03, 2012

Cotton Candy Crusher Crashed

A cotton candy crush is one of those catchy little teeny phrases you come across when reading teen magazines like Seventeen for instance.
"Some crushes are like cotton candy. They look yummy and totally tempting, but when you actually get a taste, there’s not much there. Suddenly you're left with disappointment and no crush. Sometimes a crush should just stay a crush and live as a delicious daydream. That way you’ll always have someone sweet to think about when you drift off to sleep."
Hi. I am Joys Camille and I am a cotton candy crusher.

If you follow me on Twitter, you're probably aware of my infamous claim: "Zara is the best policy" and how it's one of my favorite therapies since I got here. And it's almost always true. If you don't know me any better, you'd probably think it's about the recent collection and to-die-for pieces, well... not exactly. My most recent Zara haul was at the beginning of the year when the massive sale took place. I normally don't buy stuff from the regular price rack unless it's really something that I want AND need, like a pair of shoes and a handbag, or a statement shirt I can't let go of. So clearly, that's not my point. Zara is the best policy because I am a cotton candy crusher and the cotton candy crush happens to be the store supervisor! So let me rephrase that. ZARA SHJ is the best policy. But not anymore...

I can clearly remember the last time I was there. I had to wrap my scarf around my shirt because I feel shy wearing one of the statement shirts currently on sale. In my defense I didn't know we were going to the store that day, I was fighting an emotional battle and my folks thought I could use all the help I can get and the sight of my cotton candy crush is a surefire on my list. He was wearing his version of a 3-piece-suit - a black blazer, printed white v-neck shirt, black skinny and black buttoned up boots in all his scruffy sixfooterish self glory. I like that about him. I know supervisors around here mostly wear suits but he's an exception and maybe that's why I find his style interesting. Who doesn't want a man who knows how to dress himself up?

My auntie knew I wanted one of those colored pants but I knew deep inside me that I have had enough and already exceeded my initial budget so I really cannot afford another pair. So when she handed it to me, I had to return it back with a heavy heart to the nearest rack within my reach. And that was when the highlight of my cotton candy crushing history happened! I didn't notice he was leaning against that rack! So basically, it made an impact on him and he looked back to see who the culprit may be! Straight right at me and flashed me the sweetest and warmest smile ever for God knows long how! I know I can be such a big dealer but this wasn't our first encounter! He never smiles, let alone looks at someone in the eye even if he's aware you're looking! I know because I've been there before, it's as if I don't exist at all. And my stares are usually impolite. You can literally feel its weight even from a distance so I'm pretty sure I've been on his peripheral view more often than he'd make it look like. I cannot even remember if he for real said HI or I was just imagining things after that! But I am pretty sure those smiles were for me. For the first time. And little did I know, for the last time.

It took me a month to return and I want to kick myself endlessly for taking that long! Because the thing I dread the most happened whilst I wasn't poppin' around on a weekly basis like I used to. He's nowhere to be found around the store and it's a Friday! He's always there on a Friday! Then suddenly every new face around me started making sense. He wasn't on his usual spot near the counter, in front of the lappy. He wasn't sitting in one of those display tables whilst talking to someone over the phone. He wasn't inside the staff room cos he never emerged the whole 45 minutes we were there. I was there. He wasn't. He just wasn't there because they have had a staff overhaul!

I have no idea where he's at now. I only managed to ask the broadest questions from the staff and I still can't make that bold move of just asking where's my cotton candy crush at now! I don't even have a name. All I have is a face, a smile, and my one-sided-memories. I plan on going to each possible Zara store around Dubai and hope against hope I bump into him inside one of those. I am not even kidding. Desperate times require desperate measures. And as fate would always have it, I came across this song and wow, a no brainer. My official soundtrack as far as my cotton candy crusher crashed incident is concerned. Have a listen!


Hi. I am Joys Camille and I am a cotton candy crusher... no more.
According to Yuna, I am in love with someone out of town... now.
Good point.

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